Enter the Young Dragon

MSTed by Alicia Ashby (editor), Antaeus Feldspar, Glazius Falconar, Michael Wallen, Amanda Van Rhyn, Justin Rau, Keith Palmer, Steve Savage, JP Chabot, Ben-San Arizona, Will Crain, Mike Leal, Kenny Blackwell, Thomas Wilde, NotReallyHere, Jeff Yang, Damien Karolev, and Amanda Berman

Story by David

Read this MSTing (reader discretion advised).

Fanfic: Internationally famous abuse survivor and drug addict David Morgan flees America for Japan to escape the concentration camps for homosexuals set up by the new administration, heavily armed Secret Service agents hard on his heels. Fortunately, David's arsenal is also extremely impressive, and in the running firefight he stumbles into the top-secret headquarters of NERV. The battle continues to rage underground, David sparing no opportunity to drink the beer and sake he keeps running across and shooting up with the "drugs" provided by an especially helpful woman in a medical lab.

In fact, all the people of NERV are more than willing to drop everything they're doing and spring to the aid of the persecuted David. As soon as the agents have been disposed of and David is out of rehab and drinking Pepsi instead of liquor, he's formally accepted into the elite circle of Evangelion pilots. Gendo Ikari, cheerful and helpful as ever, promptly moves all of them into a huge beachfront house with a recording studio and pool. After a series of character-boosting lectures from his new friends and a jam session with them, David's day gets even better when Shinji Ikari just happens to be attracted to him. The two get in touch with each other in a slightly messy scene.

Host Segments: Prologue: The magazines sent up to the Satellite of Love have convinced Crow and Tom Servo they're "one-hundred-percent Grade-A pure lesbians" and inspired Gypsy to develop a "tight six-pack."
Invention: The mads have developed the portable Linger-Cam to simplify the work of Japanese animation studios. Joel and the bots demonstrate "Bible: The Collectible Card Game," with expansion packs coming soon for all major faiths.
Segment Two: The story has put the bots in "an anime kind of mood," so they watch the new show "Pog Warriors." Joel's earnest efforts to plumb the show's subtle depths only gets the bots mad at him.
Segment Three: Tom and the others sing "Comfortably Dumb," a tribute to David, and then talk cheerfully about the wonderful world David whipped up in his story (wonderful, that is, so long as you don't think about all the homosexuals still stuck in concentration camps in the United States...)
Stinger: David's struggles with the barter system.

Reflections: This was not only the first MSTing featuring Joel I tried working on, but also the first MSTing of a slashfic I worked on. I'm not in the core demographic for those stories, so I did wonder at first how I would take it. Ultimately, though, its essential wackiness made it seem no more offensive than "Triumph of the 'Retart'," which also happened to feature a main character named David...

This MSTing was also an online MSTing, in which people got together on the IRC channel associated with the Vault of Anime MSTings and posted riffs as they thought of them. Alicia Ashby graciously let me cheat by thinking of riffs ahead of time, though. I wasn't online for all of the MSTing, but I'm pretty satisfied with what I contributed to the ultimate finished version.

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